Like the Razzies, we here at GOPClownShow do the Golden Elephant Award every year to spread the values of Mock and Scorn around. Worst Actress Ever (worse than JLo in Gigli and Madonna in Swept Away because there is simply NO redeeming factor here): Bristol Palin in Secret Lives. A consolation prize goes to the editor and director, for staying on the other actress for as long as possible without making it appear that Bristol’s voice was floating disconnected from any human.
Dan has super cool toilet paper with which you can celebrate the ending to the W reign of terror, or if you prefer, you can use it to decorate patriots’ lawns in protest of their armed appearances at our Presidnt’s appearances. Oh, no, I kid. You know Homeland Security is just waiting to arrest nice liberal artists and toilet paper collectors who dare to litter the homes of our nation’s true patriots!
Another slow news day. Oil is still leaking (or, as they say on Fox News, sharing or merging with ocean and critters — no PROBLEM though) and no one can stop it — not even President Obama, who is after all, responsible for everything including my failure to brush my teeth last night. We really need to vote him out of office. Remember the good old days, when the Chief sneered out “nuk-u-leer” with great affection? Sigh. Anyhoo, news is slow so OUT COME THE POLLS.
APPARENTLY, DEMOCRATS WILL LOSE SOME SEATS IN THE HOUSE THIS FALL! (Gasp! Get the smelling salts!)
Let’s play a game, shall we? The name of the game is called “Imagine.” The way it’s played is simple: we’ll envision recent happenings in the news, but then change them up a bit. Instead of envisioning white people as the main actors in the scenes we’ll conjure – the ones who are driving the action – we’ll envision black folks or other people of color instead. The object of the game is to imagine the public reaction to the events or incidents, if the main actors were of color, rather than white. Whoever gains the most insight into the workings of race in America, at the end of the game, wins.
If you thought the hypocrisy of the Family Values Republicans like Argentinian Trail Hiking Sanford swinging at C-Street was disgusting, check this out. Here is Rep Souder (R-IN) being interviewed by the woman he has been having an affair with, while smugly calling out Democrats for their failure to legislate morality (not a truly conservative value, FYI) over their insistence that Abstinence Only does not work – this has been proven by….Bristol Palin as well as those loathsome “supposed” scientists conducting research for the high-minded fact-lovin’ freaks on the left.
For the love of God, people, stop drunk dialing the astroturfing plastic Jesus at Freedom Works! You are NEVER going to get off the teat of Big Government if you keep harassing the lobbyists like this! Just look at the Geico guy! Fox and Freedom Works stuck it to him like good Fascists would and [...]
Republican Family Values Include Porn but not Abortion. Don’t ya hate it when your family values get tangled up in the skanky reality of your everyday life? I mean, if you’ve been busy repressing all those thoughts along with women’s rights, you know…it can get stuffy.
As if we needed more proof that “God’s Warriors” are really just misinformed, foul-mouthed, angry cracker-spewing, fast-food eating, Fox-viewing 23 percenters….Here ya’ go. Now, if you put some red Naughty Monkeys on this lady and took her on a Drillbilly raid of Neimans, you would have your Republican 2010 Presidential candidate.
“Drill baby drill!” The Republican bumper sticker energy policy is not lookin’ so hot…Thanks to the last 8 years of massive deregulation, we now have 40% if our wetlands being attacked by oil slicks. A haunting look back at the leaders of “drill baby drill” and the mindless drones following them.